We asked for your best data jokes and wow, did you deliver! Here are just a few of our top picks in anticipation of SQLBits 2022. (Because And what would this blog be if I didn’t include a selection of dad jokes? But where do I keep all my dad jokes? In a dadabase! – @gregmckinnell)
We’ll start with the most popular catch of the day by Mr. Beard himself – Rob Sewell!
Q: What does a shark and a database have in common?
Come on.. take a guess! Ok, ok. I’ll tell you!
A: They both have megabites!
Oh, you’re so clever. Oh, you’re so innovative. When will you stop coming up with such brilliance? Fine, he (@sqldbawithbeard) really does pull it out of the bag on this next one…
Q: Can you tell the make of my laptop?
A. it’s a-Dell!
Which was accompanied by a wonderful video of Rob showing off his DELL Laptop covered in stickers with the beautiful sounds of Adele over the top – love it!
Honestly, this joke takes the cake for today! Yet there were so many more absolutely classic puns that followed Rob’s lead. I tried my own song-and-tech joke but it didn’t quite go down as well…
Q: Would you like to see my database of some of the worst songs?
A: It’s called a CarDB!
Badum tsssss…. Get it? Cardi B? I made myself laugh… but not anyone else.
Swiftly moving on then! We had an excellent joke from Barney, (@SQLBarney) are you ready for it?
Q: Why did IKEA fire all their DBA’s?
A: Because they kept on dropping tables!
There are so many table-dropping jokes that go around, and they are still as good every time I hear one. Want another?
Q: Why do you never ask SQL people to help you move your furniture?
A: They sometimes drop the tables ?
Next up we had some more DBA-related memes…
Things you never want to hear from your DBA:
….. ‘Uh oh’ (@Hugo_Kornelis)
Q: What’s the difference between God and a DBA?
A: God doesn’t think he’s a DBA! ?
Feel free to check out the rest of the absolutely amazing tweets we got in response on our Twitter: @SQLBits